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Dating danger signs

by Shelley Poston It can be difficult to be clear-headed in a dating relationship.

It is easy to see only the positive in the other person and completely ignore any warning signs. It would be foolish to date someone and not even consider the possible outcomes.

Not only would it be foolish, but downright selfish.

If there is always that possibility, then you must ask yourself whether this person has the qualities you will need in a husband. Ask yourself these questions: How strong is his relationship with Jesus Christ? How passionate is he about reading God’s Word, prayer, and fellowship with other believers in a biblically solid church? However, in Ephesians Paul compares a husband’s role toward his wife with that of Christ’s role toward His Bride, the Church, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, the she might be holy and without blemish,” (Ephesians -27, emphasis mine).

Christ’s role and a husband’s role do differ because only Christ alone can truly cleanse us.

However, a husband is responsible to lead his wife in sanctification, as this verse explains with the imagery of Christ and His bride.

If a man cannot do that, he is not ready to be a husband.

And if he is not ready to be a husband, dating him could only have a sorrowful outcome.

Marriage is a covenantal bond between a man and a woman where there is dependence—to a certain extent.

If you are dating a man who expects you to be everything to him and always make him happy, you both are in for a harsh awakening after the honeymoon ends.

You are both sinners and you will sin against each other.

While you do not want that to happen, it is reality. Also, if he wants you to meet all his needs, that is close to idolatry (Exodus 20:3, 4). Do not fall for the statement of, “I just care about you so much,” when a guy won’t keep his hands to himself.

You will disappoint each other, not on purpose, but you will. The truth is, he cares more about himself in that scenario.

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